TODAY BARACK OBAMA TURNS 50

With his economic policy compared to a tar baby, and with fellow Democrats lashing out for the concessions he gave away to Republicans in their debt ceiling compromise, President Barack Obama turns 50 years old today.

We're guessing the man could use a vacation.

Instead, he has more work in front of him than ever before: fixing an economy, slashing the unemployment rate, running for re-election in 2012, convincing one party he isn't a Socialist and the other he isn't weaker than the chances of Ashley Hebert actually marrying J.P. Rosenbaum.

At the very least, Obama could use some birthday wishes right about now. Hang in there, Mr. President. At least you helped kill Osama Bin Laden. That guy sucked.

OSAMA BIN LADEN DEAD - CONFIRMED BY OBAMA

Osama bin Laden, US’s most wanted terrorist, was finally killed by the American military operation, according to reports.

Around 10:50 p.m. EST last night (cutting off the end of shows such as Celebrity Apprentice, amusingly), the story broke that bin Laden had been killed.

At 11:30 p.m., President Obama spoke from the White House, confirming "the most significant achievement to date in our nation's effort to defeat Al-Qaeda."

Obama revealed that the intelligence gathering and planning for the operation had been underway since LAST AUGUST and that no Americans were lost.

He reiterated that American is not at war with Islam, saying "we must also reaffirm that the United States is not - and never will be - at war with Islam."

Bin Laden was not a Muslim leader, Obama said, but a mass murderer of Muslims, and a man whose demise was both necessary and very long overdue.

As Obama said, the intelligence and armed services personnel who planned and executed this operation deserve our commendation and gratitude.